It’s sort of both at the same time, when you’re into this fantasy.
There’s different kinds of infidelity.
Falling in love with her boss and running off with him for a romantic weekend is one thing.
Having a one night stand with a guy she met on the dance floor on a night out with the girls is something else.
Cucks think more like the second thing that the first one. But it’s a spectrum.
“Stags” are more interested in casual sex. Real deal cucks might be more into the emotional pain and humiliation of a real emotional affair, where he’s almost playing third wheel to his wife’s “real” relationship.
The line between relationship and affair gets blurry.
Is it really cheating on him if he asked for it and craves it?
Even if the couple says “no”, there’s a lot of nosy busy-bodies ready to say that it is. They love to tell you what’s really going in on your own life. Like you aren’t able to make your own romantic and sexual decisions.
If she has a romantic affair behind your back and then runs off the the guy for good, you aren’t “in a cuckold relationship”. You got cheated on and dumped. Sorry.
But for everything short of that, you’re on a spectrum. You might get there because she cheated (for real) and you realized it was arousing. You might be one of those couples that finds their way in by encouraging her to act on his fantasies.
Either way, it’s only cheating because it’s sexy to both of you. That’s not at all like a real hurtful affair.
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